104 Worst SEO Jokes & Puns Ever Written

seo jokes and puns

If you love great jokes then this article isn’t for you, however if you’re a fan of half-baked puns and cringe-worthy SEO-related jokes then maybe you’ll have a good time here…

  1. Why did the SEO guys lose the dance competition? – Because they had no algo-rythm.
  2. Why does SEO like crossing the road? – It likes getting hit with traffic.
  3. How does an SEO find his way back home from the woods? – Using bread crumbs.
  4. Why do we call it the Mini-Panda update? – Because the content it finds is a little bare.
  5. Why couldn’t the SEO find his hotel room? – Because he booked room 404.
  6. Why didn’t the SEO want to get married? – He prefers the engagement.
  7. What’s a Black Hat SEO’s least favorite food? – Spam!
  8. What’s an SEO’s favorite lunch snack? – Cookies and link juice boxes.
  9. What’s an SEO’s favorite fruit? – Any low-hanging fruit will do the trick.
  10. Why does everyone in the bank line hate SEO? – Because he cuts in line to get the 1st position.
  11. What’s an SEO’s favorite type of music? – ALT-ernative.
  12. What does an SEO call someone that back-peddles in a conversation? – A trackback. 
  13. How does Screaming Frog get home after a long day? – He crawls.
  14. Why are SEO and photo framing shops good friends? – They both have “Matte” Cutts.
  15. Why do SEOs like Whole Foods Market? – It has a large selection of organic and fresh content.
  16. How does the SEO tell his father he needs to go to the bathroom? – Dad, I FTP.
  17. What does the SEO say when you knock on the bathroom door? – Busy, IP.
  18. Why do White Hat SEOs take forever to shop? – Because they look for Quality Content.
  19. Why does the SEO hate his work commute? – Too much traffic.
  20. What do you call an SEO that changes their clothes efficiently? – Conversion Optimization Specialist.
  21. What’s an SEOs favorite superhero? – Spiderman!
  22. Why do SEOs like public speaking? – Because they like an Audience.
  23. What do SEOs drink before the gym? – Link Juice!
  24. What’s an SEO’s favorite way to enter a room? – Through the login form.
  25. What’s an SEO’s favorite Mario Kart character? – Browser.
  26. Why does the SEO like shopping? – Because he likes to stay on top of seasonal trends.
  27. What did the SEO name his son? – JSON.
  28. Why do people not trust SEOs? – Because he markups everything.
  29. What’s an SEO’s favorite hiding spot? – On page 2, nobody ever looks there.
  30. Why don’t SEOs like Thanksgiving? – Too much (keyword) stuffing.
  31. Why did the SEO turn down a business offer? – It was a Pyramid Schema.
  32. Why did the URLs come together for Christmas dinner? – Because they’re relative URLs.
  33. Why did Google tell the articles to calm down? – Because they had hyper-links.
  34. Why don’t SEOs like soup? – It’s thin content.
  35. What’s an SEO’s favorite deodorant? – Lynx!
  36. What are an SEO’s least favorite animals? – Pandas and penguins.
  37. Why is SEO an amazing investigator? – He likes to create detailed Index Coverage reports.
  38. How does SEO find his favorite contacts on his phone? – He adds “H1” before their names.
  39. What does SEO wear to a formal event? – A Black Hat.
  40. What do SEO, websites, and girl scouts have in common? – They all like cookies.
  41. Why didn’t people enjoy the SEO’s play? – The JavaScript wasn’t any good.
  42. What does an SEO rely on for directions? – He trusts the lighthouse to bring him home.
  43. Why does SEO like monkeys? – Because they have long tails.
  44. Why are SEOs good at trivia games? – Because he’s great at Quick Answers.
  45. Why did people enjoy the SEO’s rock concert? – Because he turns up the AMP.
  46. What’s an SEO’s favorite view? – A Page View.
  47. What did Google say after it beat its biggest competitor in unique traffic? – Yahoo!
  48. What does the SEO leader say to his team? – Come, do-follow me.
  49. Why did the customer report the search engine? – Because it was a creepy crawler.
  50. Why does the SEO get a haircut before taking a profile picture? – To get a Featured Snippet.
  51. Why does Google need a manicure? – Because many websites complain about Google Scrapping them.
  52. What’s an SEOs favorite game? – Canonical Tag!
  53. What do SEOs and chiropractors have in common? – They both fix back-links.
  54. Why do SEOs avoid bouncy castles? – They have a high bounce rate.
  55. Why does the soccer team like to get in touch with the SEO? – To set up goals and avoid penalties.
  56. What’s a pirate’s favorite metric? – CT-Rrrrrrrrrr.
  57. Why doesn’t the SEO like twins? – Because they’re duplicate content.
  58. What do you call a different version of a game of tag? – ALT tag!
  59. What does an SEO do when they have a huge fight with a friend? – They Disavow them.
  60. What did the SEO say to his creepy stalker? – Nofollow?
  61. How did the SEO know that the victim was desperate for answers? – He found him on the second page.
  62. How did the SEO go on his vacation? – He used a destination URL.
  63. What did the SEO tell his links about teamwork? – You’re only as strong as your weakest link.
  64. What does an SEO exchange with their partner on their wedding day? – Reciprocal links.
  65. Why are SEOs an excellent fisher? – He uses Linkbait.
  66. Why did Google penalize the airport website? – Because it had too many landing pages.
  67. What do you do to get the most link juice out of websites? – You squeeze pages.
  68. What’s an SEOs favorite mid-day activity? – He likes to take long NAPs.
  69. Why are Black Hat SEOs terrible hockey players? – Because they spend a lot of time in the penalty box.
  70. Why did the SEO have trouble moving his boat out of the dock? – The boat had too many anchors.
  71. How did the woman know that her date was an SEO expert? – He repeats the same word every few seconds.
  72. Who did SEO crown at the royal ceremony? – Content, because it’s king.
  73. What’s an SEO’s favorite breakfast? – Java and SPAM.
  74. What do you call a man that has more than five fingers on one hand? – Supplemental index.
  75. What does an SEO call Zelda when she’s in trouble? – Linkbait.
  76. What does an SEO call a dating service that collects a fee when two people match? – Pay per click.
  77. What does an SEO do to return songs that he didn’t like? – Applies for a trackback.
  78. What’s the difference between an SEO and a data analyst? – The data analyst knows he’s boring.
  79. Why are mobile marketers amazing parents? – They’re incredibly responsive.
  80. Why does the SEO stay away from the playground during recess? – Because he’s terrified of the sandbox.
  81. Why did the SEO pay top dollar for his new house? – To avoid a bad neighborhood.
  82. Why did the money exchange service pay an SEO a visit? – To improve their Conversion Rates.
  83. Why are most Penguins banned from major sports events? – Because they cause too many penalties.
  84. What do SEOs and priests have in common? – They both want you to convert.
  85. How does the SEO chiropractor charge his clients? – Cost per click.
  86. What did SEO say to the client when he asked to rank #1 by tomorrow? – Sure, and I’ll also send you a free unicorn.
  87. What’s an SEO digital marketer’s favorite cake? – A “Funnel” cake.
  88. Why don’t people hire SEOs to tap dance? – Because he expects to be Paid-per-click.
  89. Why did the SEO break up with his fiancee? – Because of a serious lack of engagement.
  90. What was SEO’s first word to his dad? – Da-ta.
  91. Why didn’t the SEO stay with his partner? – They weren’t on the same landing page.
  92. Why did the backlinks file for a restraining order? – They were not do-follow links.
  93. What’s a movie director’s favorite part of a search ad? – The call to Action!
  94. Why do you have to get to work before SEO managers? – Because of all the traffic they create.
  95. Why is SEO good at scrabble? – He has many disa-vowels.
  96. Why is a Jedi incredibly good at finding leads? – He uses the Sales Force.
  97. Why was the SEO afraid of the website? – Because it had domain authority.
  98. Why did the SEO delete all his social media accounts? – He’s going through an “Anti-Socials” phase.
  99. Why did the photographer invite an SEO to the photoshoot? – Because he’s excellent at attribution modeling.
  100. What does an SEO call three bottles of microbrew? – Simple, a local 3-pack.
  101. What does an SEO say when you ask him about his new partner? – We just clicked.
  102. Why did the PPC manager have a hard time on a dating app? – He had trouble picking his match types.
  103. Why do SEO marketers love mountain hiking? – They love seeing all the evergreens.
  104. How does an email spammer’s blind date find him at the bar? – He’ll be wearing a Black Hat.

…so there you have it, they were terrible, weren’t they!?

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